Dating

You may associate the word ‘friend zone’ with men who get repeatedly rejected by women who are out of their league. Or more precisely, that poor fella who wants more than a platonic relationship with his bestie but because she’s never given him the green light, he keeps his mouth shut – sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

While the friend zone is most commonly a place where men are left to rot in, there are also times when women find themselves in that same dreaded situation – that’s right, women get friend zoned too!

Luckily for me, I have yet to experience it myself (never say never). But sadly, I have witnessed one or two gals being friend zoned and are somehow blind to it.

If you keep using his ‘shyness’ as an excuse for not making a move on you, then maybe it’s time to re-evaluate the situation. Here are 10 telltale signs that you’re in the friend zone.

1. When he asks you to chill, you actually chill

You watch a film from start to finish, you’re under the same blanket but never cuddle, he burps in your face and isn’t shy about it – you get the picture. If you never miss a single scene when watching a film together, then that is undeniable proof that you’re in the friend zone – sorry to break it to you.

2. He calls you bro

You could wear all the dresses in the world if you wanted to, but once he calls you ‘bro’ (and feels comfortable about it too) you are deep in the friend zone and you won’t be swimming in the shallow end anytime soon!  He clearly sees you as one of his male friends – nothing more, nothing less.

3. He tells you about the women he pulls 

Every time he shacks up with someone new, you’re one of the first people to hear about it. He has no problem telling you about his hot dates, problematic relationships or steamy one night stands. In his mind, you are there to listen.

4. He tells you that any man would be lucky to have you 

5. He introduces you to people as his sister

When you meet his new friends, he often throws in the word ‘sister’ as a little reminder of where you two stand – not purposely, of course. He just loves you SO much, you’re like a sister to him. It has gotten so bad that you’re even starting to wonder whether or not people actually know you by name.

6. He doesn’t notice when you’re dressed to the nines

When he first saw you in a bikini he didn’t bat an eye lid and when you’re all dolled up for your night out, he doesn’t even flinch. At this stage, you feel you could walk by him half naked and he wouldn’t even notice! Friend zone level? deep!

7. He continually tells you to get with one of his boys

He keeps telling you what a cute couple you and John would make. Meanwhile, you are thinking about what a cute couple you and him would make.

8. He never ever flirts

If he flirts with every woman that walks into the room except you, then that my dear is what you call the extreme level of friend zone. Can you even remember the last time he paid you a compliment? I thought as much.

9. He pats you on the head

When you see him interacting with other girls, you see him poking them, tickling them and having a laugh. Not to mention, they always get a kiss on the cheek before they part ways. Other women get a kiss on the cheek, but you get a pat on the head – friend zone at its finest.

10. He often makes you his sidekick

If you can’t remember the last time his wingman was actually a MAN, then most likely you are in the friend zone for the long run. You might as well get yourself new runners, some baggy pants and get used to him calling you ‘dude.’ If that doesn’t suit, then remove yourself from the situation and go find yourself a new distraction. Oh yea, and chin up!

Until next time 🙂

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After a breakup, you may feel a combination of many emotions: disappointment, heartbreak and sometimes even regret. The aftermath of a long or shortterm relationship is never pretty, and in cases where a few bottles of wine are involved, it can get a bit messy – I know this, all too well!

While blaring ‘I Will Survive’ in your room every morning and although making a cow out of yourself at a drunken karaoke session are both very much acceptable – in my books anyways, there are just some things that you should never ever doing after a bad breakup.

If the word pride means anything to you, then you will not and you must not do any of the following things:

Contact his family members

Just because his mother adored you, it doesn’t give you a reason to start ringing her and checking up to see how she is doing or asking her how things have been. You didn’t ring her when you thought she was going to be your mother in-law so why the sudden interest in ‘her’ life now? Cut the crap, we all who you’re really asking about!

Create a page for stalking

When your ex gets a friend request from someone who recently joined Facebook just days after the breakup, they might just get a bit suspicious. Let’s face it; most people have had their Facebook accounts longer than they can remember, so spare yourself the embarrassment of setting up a Facebook account for stalking purposes. Remember your pride!

Listen to depressing music for too long

Yes, we all love Adele, and yes, we are all clearly aware of what listening to Ed Sheeran does. But whatever you do, don’t dwell on the pain for too long, otherwise you will just be stuck and unable to get out of that mind frame. They say crying is good for the soul, so do allow yourself to shed a few tears, but don’t let it drag on for longer than it should! #StayStrong

Go on a Facebook rant

I know we live in a digital age, and social media plays a big part in most of our lives. But can we just leave Facebook out of it? We are preserving our pride, taking the high road and all that jazz. Pick up kick boxing if you must, apparently it’s a good way to let off steam. Just don’t put your business out there for Facebook to see.

Carry yourself like a hobo

We all have a hoody reserved for those ‘I’ll never get over it,’ moments. It allows us to sulk and feel sorry for ourselves in the comfort of our own homes – or in the home of a good friend. But, you know what they say: looking good is feeling good. Putting on your heels and getting a bit dolled up makes all the difference in the world. Try it out, you might surprise yourself!

Feed your emotions

After a breakup, men usually hit the gym and women usually turn to food for comfort. But while you’re eating away and getting bigger, he is lifting weights and getting fitter.  I’m not saying you should start bodybuilding or anything, but instead of feeding your emotions, take up a fun class like Steps or Zumba. Not only will it help your mental state, it will also help you physically!

Befriend his ex

Purposely befriending someone who used to go out with the person you once were –and probably still are – crazy about, is simply a recipe for disaster! Man bash all you like, but do to it with a trusted friend and not the psycho ex – unless of course, you want to graduate to that title? I didn’t think so.

Jump into bed with a stranger….. or a friend

You feel like crap, and a bit of male attention would be nice right about now. But whatever you do, do not, I repeat, do NOT jump into bed with a complete stranger – or any of your male friends for that matter. Kissing is fine. There’s nothing wrong with a bit of lip locking every now and again. So long as you don’t do it with a friend as you will only regret it (not that I know anything about doing things that you shouldn’t be with your friends…. but I’d imagine that’s how one would feel, right?)

The point is, there are just some things you shouldn’t do after a breakup, and these 8 are some of them! Hope you all have a fab day xxx

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I can’t sit here and say that every single one of my exes were idiots, because that would be a lie. But there were certainly one or two – okay maybe three – four max, that I would gladly give that title to.

If all the years that I’ve spent being in either a serious relationship or in a confused situationship, has taught me anything, it is this: there are just some guys you need to steer clear of.

These are the type of men who add absolutely no value to your life – dead weights, is what I call them.  All they do is waste your time, energy and emotions – and there’s nothing worse than wasted emotions, right?

So if you want to avoid listening to ‘I Can’t Make You Love Me,’ while scoffing down the unwanted chocolate you found at the back of your press from last Christmas, then here are some of the men you should stay away from:

The eager beaver

He puts pressure on you to meet your parents, he drops random hints about moving in together and you are still unsure about whether or not you had much of an input on having sex with him for the first time – oh it’s all coming back now, isn’t it? The eager beaver doesn’t really care who he is with, as long as he has SOMEONE. He is just in a rush to settle down and find a woman to take care of him – and then he’ll probably have someone else on the side.  Spare yourself the heartache and move on.

The unreliable one

He always says he’s going to take you out, you always hear him talking about how he’d like to spend a weekend away with you. But these things never actually happen, do they? If his actions aren’t matching his words now, don’t expect things to be any different a few months down the line. He’s good at talking the talk, but he ain’t very good at walking the walk. The unreliable one needs to be reminded of where the front door is.

The one who can’t keep his pants up

We all love sex. There’s no arguing that. But if he wants to get dirty between the sheets at every second of the day, then how can you ever trust him to be loyal when you’re not around? Or God forbid, you have an injury and are unable to perform as you normally would? Exactly. Three or four times a day? Absolutely fine. But wanting it all day every day is never a good sign, and it may also call for some professional help.

The one foot in and one foot out kinda guy

He uses his past as an excuse to not fully commit to you. Yet, judging by his track record, his previous relationship don’t seem any different to the night time visit arrangement you have with him now. He is just trying to have his cake and eat it too and is using ‘heartbreak’ as a way to avoid having a real relationship with you. This kind of guy needs to take both of his feet and keep them out. #ByeFelicia

The one who always seems to be short on cash

If it’s not ‘I forgot my wallet at home,’ it’s ‘there has been a delay with my payment.’ Either way, you are starting to wonder whether he even owns a bank account or not. The one who always seems to be short on cash is a pro when it comes to excuses and me thinks him and Mr. Unreliable up there should get together some time.

The one with zero ambition

He barely made it through school, and he now spends his days sitting in front of the telly watching sports. He has no idea where his life is going – not that he even cares – and he doesn’t seem to be having any positive influence on your life. As the saying goes ‘a man who can’t commit to himself, can not commit to anyone else,’ I’m pretty sure that says it all.

The one you can’t seem to read

He sends you ambiguous messages and says things that you never fully comprehend. You think he is interested in you, but you still have your doubts. Chances are, the guy is just stringing you along for his own amusement. If he really wanted to have some sort of relationship with you then he would make an effort and you wouldn’t be trying to decipher his messages at 2 o’clock in the morning!

The hot and cold kinda guy

Today you have his undivided attention, and tomorrow you’re wondering why you haven’t heard from him all day. If you’re wondering why you’ve suddenly stopped hearing from him, then that is probably because somebody else has his attention. I don’t know about you, but I’m not very good with sharing my men.

If you have one of these men in your life, then you already know what to do…… hope you all have a good evening 🙂

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