Breakups suck. They really do. And whether it’s the end of a romantic relationship or a platonic one, nobody enjoys getting rid of someone who played such a huge role in their life. That’s why it’s important to take necessary steps to ensure that you move on in the healthiest way possible.Yes, there will be some ice cream involved – there is always ice cream involved! So when I say healthiest, I’m talking about your mindset here. It’s about moving forward without bringing all that crazy with you.
These five steps should help you keep your sanity hat on – even if you feel you have every reason in the world to take it off! #StayStrong
1. Closure, chats and all the rest
When a relationship ends, I do the usual: delete, block and suppress – it’s like it never happened! Then, I get on the “I hate men” bandwagon, until I get over it and find another idiot who makes me go through the whole thing again (no wonder I’m crazy). But overtime, I have come to learn that the ‘C’ word actually does help. That dreaded talk after a breakup might seem like an impossible task, but once you finally build up the courage to do it, you’ll find that it helps give a clearer idea of what went wrong in the relationship so that you can make any necessary changes and improvements for your next – we’re thinking positively here, people! As well as that, it gives you the opportunity to get everything off your chest. Whether it changes the situation or not is completely irrelevant. It’ll put your mind at ease knowing you said everything you wanted to say.
2. A night in with the girls – or two!
This is probably one of the most important steps to getting over a breakup – spending a night with the girls. Get some wine, chocolate, ice cream or whatever it is that you like to indulge in (the sweeter the better), and make a night of it. There’s no point in isolating yourself in your room or feeling sorry for yourself. Have a few drinks with the girls and just let it out, you’ll feel much better in morning (take it from a girl who once brought over three bottles of wine and two tubs of icing to a friends), this is a foolproof plan, it absolutely works! And you know what they say about good friends, they multiply joys and divide sadness.
3. Retail therapy is a must
You know that handbag you had your eye on a few weeks ago but were unsure about how to fit it into your budget? Now is the time to buy it! There’s nothing a bit of retail therapy can’t fix. Whether it’s a new bag, new shoes new makeup or all the above, just go out there and get yourself some retail therapy. And when you’re done, take a break and do it all over again! Your bank account can’t possibly be angry at you forever now, can it?
4. Back to the drawing board
When people are in a relationship they tend to do things together. A Friday evening catching up on your favourite TV series becomes a movie night with your significant other and a Sunday morning doing yoga becomes a walk in the park + 1. Your own habits and interests can sometimes become a lost memory after spending so much time with someone else. So when you become single again, it is important to go back to base. Think about the things you once enjoyed and start doing them again. Who knows, you might make some new discoveries in the process!
5. Find your zen
Now I’m not going to tell you to get out there, walk barefoot in the grass and start talking to the trees or anything like that (I haven’t quite reached that level yet). But, what I will say is this: dedicating 10 – 15 mins of your day to meditate and practice some breathing exercises really does help get through the day. Practising calmness is essential for your physical health as well as mental health and there are plenty of YT videos related to meditation that can help you get started. You can choose to do it first thing in the morning or right before bedtime, the choice is yours. Start off with 8 minutes and then slowly build it up. Believe me it gets easier!
It would make sense for me to finish off by saying that it’ll get better in time, but I honestly can’t stand any of those quotes related to time. So what I will say is this:
“If you can’t fly then run, if you can’t run then walk, if you can’t walk then crawl. But whatever you do you have to keep moving forward.”
– Martin Luther King Jr.