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Posted on December 4, 2019

Paint and drink! Channel your inner Van Gogh on this arty date

12 Dates of Crimbo

paint and date

Paintclub is a date night idea I have yet to tick off my bucket list, so I’ll admit that we are now moving onto uncharted territory here. However, I remember first coming across the idea of unleashing my inner Van Gogh while sipping on a glass of prosec, exactly this time last year, when photos of Prosecco and Paint events were flooding my Instagram feed.

It didn’t take me very long to discover that tickets for Prosecco and Paint sell out fairly quickly and more importantly, they only had events in Dublin. So in a desperate attempt to see if I could find any similar events closer to me, I discovered Paintcluba premier social painting events company that provides pop-up art classes for people of all levels in nine locations nationwide.

Paintclub classes currently operate in Galway, Cork, Limerick, Kilkenny, Killarney, Athlone, Kildare, Howth as well as Dublin City. This means there might even be a workshop around the corner from you! 🙂

paint and date

At this point you’re probably wondering exactly how it all works.

Here is a step-by-step guide on how you can get in on the fun, straight from the horses mouth!

  • Step 1: Check out upcoming events near you.
  • Step 2: Book tickets online.
  • Step 3: Mark your Paintclub date in your diary.
  • Step 4: On the day of your workshop you will be provided all the materials, paint, brushes and even the apron.
  • Step 5: Have a drink and relax before getting started.
  • Step 6: Paint! Paint! Paint! Turn your blank canvas into a finished masterpiece with the help of guided instructions.
  • Step 7: Break! Take a breather or grab another drink.
  • Step 8: Voila! Take home your finished masterpiece!

For information on location and ticket prices, have a look on the Paintclub website.

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Posted on December 3, 2019

Skate and date with Dundrum on Ice is back!!!

12 Dates of Crimbo

skate and date with dundrum on ice

The Skate and Date initiative with Dundrum On Ice is back and it continues to offer a top quality seasonal ice skating experience for ice skating lovers of all levels.

I’ve decided to add this to my 12 Dates of Crimbo because the last time I availed of this offer, I was with my gal pals. It was such a great laugh and I think it would be just as fun with a special someone.

Whether you are a seasoned pro or an amateur skater, any couple who is even remotely interested in this winter activity can enjoy the skate and date experience along with an enticing two-course meal in Jamie’s Italian Restaurant across the way.

You can have a read of my full skate and date experience here.

Fun facts about ice skating that you might want to know:

  • Ice skating developed from the old school dance, the Waltz.
  • The ‘layback spin,’ a move that requires a great deal of flexibility is one that females tend to have more success doing in comparison to men *cough* women are better than men *cough*
  • It can increase chemistry in a relationship because moments of anxiety (for the newbies) and adrenaline rushes (for the self-proclaimed pros) can lead to heightened sexual attraction.
  • Gemma Collins went down one dress size after signing up to Dancing On Ice – now if that isn’t enough of a reason to go, then I don’t know what is!

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Posted on December 2, 2019

Up for a carpet ride to the Gaiety Panto’s Aladdin?

12 Dates of Crimbo

the gaiety panto

The Gaiety Theatre recently saw the opening night of the Arabian tale of Aladdin and following a successful date in the Gaiety last month, I didn’t have to hesitate to add one of the theatre’s musical productions to my 12 Dates of Crimbo series.

I don’t know about you, but I truly believe that one can never outgrow Disney and this year’s Gaiety Panto is one that is all about magic and embracing the inner child lurking in us all.

The Gaiety’s Aladdin is said to offer ‘magic wishes and dastardly dealings’ while promising to ‘excite and delight all ages with the extra helping of song, dance, slapstick and laughter.’

As you may or may not know, The Gaiety has hosted the annual Christmas Panto every year since 1873. Located on South King Street in Dublin, it is right and across from St. Stephen’s Green Shopping Centre and sports bar, Sinnotts. 

That means you have the option of either doing a bit of shopping or having pre drinks before your date – we all know which is the obvious choice here!

This festive extravaganza has casted some favourites, including Joe Conlan as ‘Widow Twankey’ and Nicholas Grennell as ‘Abanazer.’ West End talent Julian Capolei will play ‘Aladdin’ and the beautiful ‘Suzie Seweify’ plays ‘Princess Jasmine’.

Performance Information:

  • Act 1: 60mins (approx)
  • Interval: 20mins
  • Act 2: 60mins (approx)

I already have my tickets booked for next week so keep an eye on my Instagram 🙂

the Gaiety Panto

For more booking information, be sure to visit gaietytheatre.ie

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Posted on December 1, 2019

Relax and unwind in this Dublin City Centre hotel

12 Dates of Crimbo

the address at dublin 1

The Address at Dublin 1 is located in the heart of Dublin’s city centre and it provides a date night deal that will undoubtedly whisk someone away during the run up to Christmas.

You may or may not have read my recent blog about my stay at this 4-star hotel.  If so, then it should be no surprise that I am including it in my 12 Dates of Crimbo series.

Date night at The Address at Dublin 1 is currently offering champagne on arrival and an indulgent 4-course meal on top of an overnight accommodation.

In a nutshell, this boutique hotel makes for the perfect escape for two love birds to get away from all the hustle and bustle of Christmas. Really and truly, who wouldn’t want to indulge in a full Irish after a luxurious over night stay? 🙂

the address at dublin 1The Address Date night offer includes (for 2 People):

  • Overnight accommodation
  • Full Irish Breakfast
  • A bottle of House Champagne
  • Four Course Dinner

Date Night at The Address at Dublin 1 is priced from €259 and subject to availability. To read about the full experience of staying in The Address at Dublin 1 have at my previous blog post. 

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Posted on November 30, 2019

Coca-Cola’s famous truck tour has officially started!

12 Dates of Crimbo

Coca-Cola truck tour

 

Earlier this week, I had the pleasure of attending the launch of Coca-Cola’s Christmas campaign to celebrate the trucks return for the ninth year in Ireland. After a fun evening celebrating this festive campaign, I thought a stop at the Coca-Cola truck tour would make for the perfect addition to my 12 dates of Crimbo series!

The evening was filled with trying festive food and enjoying live entertainment. The inner hopeless romantic is me was sold by all the Christmas jingles and the overall winter wonderland setting of the event.

If you watched my Instagram story on the night then you would have seen that the evening allowed for plenty of fun Instagram shots and videos.But in the midst of all the jingles, there was also a chance to donate to charity.

There was a stand where people could purchase exclusive Coca-Cola merchandise, with all proceedings going to Saint Vincent de Paul.

Between the photos on the illuminated red truck, food and Christmas carols, visiting the stop is the perfect way to get you in the Christmas spirit and spend some time with your other half in a cosy outdoor setting.sa

This year the truck will visit eight spokes around Ireland so you will have eight opportunities to visit the famous red truck and zero excuse to miss it!

The 2019 Coca-Cola Truck Tour dates for Ireland are as follows:

  • Saturday 30th November: Galway Retail Park; 2pm — 8pm
  • Sunday 1st December: Dublin, Royal Hospital Kilmainham; 2pm — 8pm
  • Wednesday 4th December: Ballina, Military Barracks; 2pm — 8pm
  • Saturday 7th December: Belfast, Custom House Square; 2pm — 8pm
  • Sunday 8th December: Belfast, Custom House Square; 2pm — 8pm
  • Friday 13th December: Cork, Mahon Point; 2pm — 8pm
  • Saturday 14th December: Waterford, Winterval; 2pm — 8pm
  • Sunday 15th December: Dublin, Pavilions Shopping Centre Swords; 2pm — 8pm

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Start the festive season with the Drogheda Christmas Festival!!!

12 Dates of Crimbo

The Late Late Toy Show is on tonight which means the countdown to Christmas has officially begun. While most people get excited around this time of year, I’ve often found the lead up to Christmas to be unnecessarily stressful.

Between the lengthy shopping queues, overcrowded roads and the general anxiety of getting a potentially insensitive gag gift, my blood pressure tends to rise a little more than usual around December.

To top it all off, it gets increasingly difficult to find the time to plan a proper date night thanks to all the Christmas-themed party invites.

As such, I have decided to compile a list of some of the most fun festive date night ideas to alleviate some of the tension around Christmas for anyone else who shares my sentiments. I have tried and tested nearly all of these at this stage and can confidently say that they’re worth every penny. 

Everyday for the next 12 days, I will be sharing a date night idea for my series ‘12 Dates of Crimbo’ so you’ll have one less thing to worry about 🙂

Without further ado, here is date 1 of my 12 Dates of Crimbo series:

Drogheda Christmas Festival

Anyone who has ever heard me speaking would tell you that they would never guess that Drogheda is my home town. Well, I hate to break it to you, but it most certainly is.

Drogheda is where I was bred (even if I do enunciate my words) and that is why I am recommending kicking off the festive season by going to the Drogheda Christmas Festival that will be taking place between December 6th – 8th. 

This family-friendly event will see Mr. & Mrs. Claus making an appearance in front of a beautiful display of lights on St. Peter’s Church, West Street where visitors will also get the chance to enjoy a Christmas market of over 50 of the highest quality craft and food exhibitions.

Drogheda Christmas Festival

The promenade at the D Hotel and Scotch Hall Shopping Centre will see a stunning vintage carousel and an outdoor cinema where couples will be able to snuggle up to watch some of the best Christmas films.

The event also promises live music & entertainment in the midst of a mini Christmas village as well as a monster bingo with plenty of prizes up for grabs.

The one thing that really stood out to me is the idea of having a toasted marshmallows stand in a Winter Wonderland setting. If that isn’t enough to entice you, then I don’t know what is! 🙂

For more details about the Drogheda Christmas Festival and what exhibitors to expect, be sure to check out the Drogheda Life

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Posted on October 1, 2019

Tinder VS Nurture: has online dating exposed human nature?

Dating

Throughout my years of attempting to navigate the bewildering world of modern romance, I’ve had many aversions towards online dating and widely used apps such as Tinder and Plenty of Fish.

Without delving straight into it or coming across as deeply judgmental, I will simply say that for the good part of the first few years Tinder surfaced into today’s dating world, I was under the impression that they were reserved for singletons who had a hard time managing to secure dates in real life – to be perfectly fair, I have no doubt in my mind that many of us shared a similar sentiment at one point or another.

It is not untrue that the growing popularity of Tinder and online dating has positively impacted the calendars of not only the socially awkward types who could never work up the courage to ask someone out on a date face-to-face. But also the calendars of individuals who simply do not have the time to meet a potential partner in ‘traditional’ ways.

Even with that in mind, I can’t help but wonder if the pros of helping those who might just have an overwhelming fear of facing rejection could possibly outweigh the cons of replacing the instant chemistry, emotional connection and sexual tension that could only be detected in the presence of a human being towards whom we have an attraction for.

I recently had an epiphany about modern relationships which made me question a lot of my views surrounding them. It came about because I recognised that I was gradually turning into a cynic about love, sex and relationships. As someone who has always had a very positive – and possibly even naive outlook – on everything that falls within the scope of love and dating (we were all Charlotte Yorks at some stage in life), I found it disheartening to see myself develop an attitude that is the antithesis of what I’ve always stood for.

This forced me to look deeper into common behaviours within modern dating and recurring patterns that I’ve been seen both in myself and the failed relationships of others. It made me question the dreadful future a lot of singletons of today and Tinder users may be heading towards.

It forced me to question whether the existence of Tinder and online dating and the increased accessibility we have to each other is a large part of the reason why men and women alike are less attracted to the idea of settling down and are instead moving more towards being sexually liberated about whom we explore our carnal desires with.

Did the burning desire to freely explore our sexual choices always exist within us and are dating apps simply revealing what we’ve always subconsciously wanted or can we hold online dating at all accountable for the fact that less and less millennials are getting married?

tinder or marriage

It’s a loaded question that has many layers, not only because there are other factors that need to be taken into consideration, but particularly because it brings in the conversation of monogamy and its biological implications. It suggests monogamy is simply a social construct that goes against human nature – an argument for which there is a lot of evidence, but a discussion for another day.

The topic at hand is the classic ‘egg or the chicken’ debate. Did the desire to be sexually free birth a large number of dating apps or did the large number of dating apps birth a generation in which the the average age of brides and grooms continue to rise?

Before we can attempt to look at this objectively, we need to look at the facts. The internet was only made widely accessible about three decades ago. In retrospect, that isn’t a very long time to fully understand or even attempt to grasp the full repercussions of having such an advanced technology be so readily available. One of the first popular dating sites came about nearly 25 years ago, and following the likes of Ashley Madison and Seeking Arrangement, it led to a lot of negative connotations.

To the contrary, the first marriage records date back to the 19th Century in Ireland and much earlier in the U.S. So how can we truly know the impact of online dating on the human psyche and the evolution of marriage? Thy say social media addiction activates the same areas of the brain as taking a class A drug, now that alone should be enough to startle us.

According to the Central Statistics Office, there were 20, 389 opposite sex marriages in Ireland in 2018, a drop from 21,262 recorded from the previous year. The average age of brides and grooms last year were 34.4 years and 36.4 years respectively.

Granted, there are a considerable number of reasons for this and I am in no way shape or form suggesting that online dating alone is the reason why the average age of grooms in opposite-sex marriage was at the highest to date last year. But it does make you question what role dating technology currently plays and the impact it will continue to have in coming years. After all, for those who do get hitched, one in four couples end up going their separate way.

Now that’s something to think about.

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Posted on August 15, 2019

How to manage relationship weight

fitness/ Health

how to deal with relationship weight

Shout out to the person who tweeted that because relationship weight is as real as it comes. In fact it is something that I am currently battling with and not because I’m rejecting it completely. But mainly because I am struggling to discern whether or not I secretly adore my new curves.

Regardless of the case, the one place I’ve always detested adding a few kilos is around my waist so for that reason alone, I decided my new predicament warranted a bit of research into why being in a new relationship is a culprit for weight gain.

According to various studies, entry into a romantic relationship is associated with obesity in a lot of couples. Now before we get ahead of ourselves, I think I should point out that it’s not all doom and gloom since it doesn’t apply to each and every couple.

Generally speaking, the kilos a budding couple puts on is often due to a result of the transition from on relationship status to another. A change in relationship status be it getting into a new one or the breakdown of an old one can result in a change of health behaviours – both positive or negative.

Happy couples in particular have an increased risk of picking up unhealthy behaviour due to date nights out or overeating during a (genuine) Netflix marathon. In a nutshell, dieting is derailed in the early stages of a new relationship.

However, it is also said that cohabiting couples are more likely to experience weight gain within two years with women having a higher chance of becoming obese within a year and the men’s odds increasing within two years.

So what does that mean for us? Shall we just chuck any diet plans we had in mind out the window seeing that we’re going to pile on the weight anyways? I think not!

Here are some guidelines for you and your other half to help keep both of your waistlines under control (disclaimer: if you so choose to) 🙂

1. Fakeaway for two 

cauliflower pizza

It can be quite the challenge to revert back to your own meal planning routine when you begin to share your time and schedule with someone else. But just because you’ve stepped off the path temporarily, it doesn’t mean things need to remain that way.

The usual date night plans of dinner and drinks eventually will decrease overtime and rather than falling into a habit of replacing it with takeaways, a healthier option would be to make dinner at home.

There are plenty of tasty recipes you can enjoy for fewer calories and a fraction of the price you’d pay at a restaurant. The result? You’d be keeping your waistline happy as well as the aul bank account! If you’re feeling brave, here is the cauliflower pizza recipe.

2. Exercise together 

Diet habits tend to take a back seat when you’re besotted with someone and when this happens it is only natural that a regular exercise regime also gets derailed.

Whether you’re an avid gym goer or not, getting into the habit of exercising with your partner is a great way to stay on top of the relationship weight.

You can lift each other up when one person is feeling dissuaded and it’s also a great form of bonding. What sort of exercise? Power walking, swimming, gym classes, there are plenty of options!

3. But not exclusively

deal with relationship weight

While it is great to have someone to encourage you to workout when you’re not feeling particularly motivated, it is equally important to remember that you shouldn’t exercise exclusively when your other half does.

Yes, couples that sweat together stay together (at least according to the ‘gram), but you are your own person and just because they need a rest day, it doesn’t mean you should follow suit.

Let the positive behaviours influence your gym schedule, not the negative ones!

4. Meal plan

protein pancakes

I’m an absolute divil for wanting fresh food and meals so I will hold my hands up and say that I am guilty of not making meal prep a priority for the week ahead. But the amount of money I’ve spent on salads or sushi for lunch when I don’t meal prep is a lot more than I’d like to admit.

So I of all people would know that meal prep is absolutely everything. When you plan your meals ahead it means you can avoid buying the cheaper and often unhealthy option for lunch or dinner. 

It also means you’ll do a weekly food shop and consequently not spend as much of your hard earned cash on food when you’re out. Here is a simple protein pancake recipe.

5. Get more shut eye (this is when my age starts to show)

Getting a night of solid sleep really does make a difference particularly because the hormones that govern hunger and appetite can be affected when a person doesn’t get enough sleep.

While this can be difficult to accomplish when sharing a bed with someone (for more reasons than one) a good way around this would be to spend some time in your own bed (alone) to get a good nights sleep.

Like most things in life, there are many other factors that need to be taken into consideration when trying to make sense of why finding love carries the potential for packing on a few kilos. Some people embrace the change while others are less welcoming to this type of change.

Whatever category you fall into, just remember that you need to do what’s best for you because whether you like it or not looking good is feeling good! 🙂

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Posted on July 9, 2019

Spend a romantic night away at The Address at Dublin 1

Dating

I’ve recently had the pleasure of waking up to a rather picturesque view from my king size bed at The Address at Dublin 1. After a much needed overnight stay in the 4-star hotel which overlooked the long-standing central railway station of North Dublin, it quickly occurred to me that Dublin has a plethora of hidden gems that often go unnoticed during the hustle and bustle of city life.

So today I wanted to give some credit where it’s due and highlight some of the things I enjoyed about having a romantic night getaway in the heart of Dublin City Centre. It goes without saying that if you watched my Instagram stories during the time while I was away then you will have already seen a glimpse of what this contemporary hotel has to offer. Nevertheless, good staycations are always worth mentioning especially after my Instagram poll last week revealed that nearly 90% of voters have never stayed in The Address at Dublin 1.  

So without further ado, here are some things I loved about The Address at Dublin 1 and 5 reasons why you should consider spending a night away in this luxury hotel 🙂

1. Location

Being from Drogheda means that things can get a bit boring in my end of the woods (disclaimer: ignore what you read in the Indo please). The Address at Dublin 1 is a perfect escape if you’re looking to be right in the centre of the big smoke.

The hotel is located right across from the side entrance of Connolly Station and it is only seconds away from the red Luas line. If you’re completely new to Dublin or the Emerald Isle then it helps to add that one of the cities main shopping areas, Henry Street is no more than a five-minute walk from the hotel. 

 

2. City Views

After checking in at the front desk, the hotel receptionist was kind enough to walk me to my club room. When I first opened the door into the bedroom it was rather dim as the lights weren’t turned on. One of the first things he showed me was how to open the curtains using a high tech touch panel that responds to a simple hand movement and the second the curtains started opening I was in awe of what was before me.

The view of the city from the 6th floor was genuinely stunning which I probably don’t have to say because the photos really do speak for themselves. We were lucky enough to have been given a room so high up. But if you end up staying on one of the lower floors then worry not as all guests have access to The Club Lounge on the 7th floor so the view can always be enjoyed from there. 

 

3. The Club Lounge

The private elevator half way through the corridor on the ground floor can take all club room guests up to The Club Lounge on the 7th floor. The private area has complimentary pastries all day as well as a coffee machine and a selection of teas to help you kick start your day. It also has a smart TV system and freshly stocked fridge and dare I say… an executive chair.

Club Room guests can use their pre-programmed key cards to get  complimentary rooftop lounge access to indulge in refreshments throughout the day. If you don’t get so lucky to have a picturesque view of the city from your room then you’re guaranteed to get it from the rooftop lounge.

 

4. In-room technology 

The high tech amenities in The Address at Dublin 1 would turn anyone into a tech junkie. The technology in this 4-star hotel is innovative, smart and above all else, incredibly simple to use – take it from a gal who used to get confused about which remote to use at home! The Club Rooms have the latest in-room touch panels for controlling the lighting, temperature and as I previously mentioned, the opening and closing of the curtains.

It also has everything between a work desk and coffee machine (for the workaholic) and complimentary Wi-Fi and a flat screen TV (for the proud hedonist). When I stay in a hotel I always like knowing whether or not I’ll have access to an iron so if you’re anything like me, it helps to note that there is an iron and an ironing board in each room and the ensuite toilet is filled with organic products from Voya.

5. Food & Beverages

The Address at Dublin 1 really does spoil guests with good quality food and drink. The night of our stay we had dinner at McGettigan’s Cookhouse & Bar where I ordered fish & chips as a main (no surprise there) and fresh profiteroles for dessert. The food did not disappoint in the slightest which is precisely why I was not at all surprised by the extensive buffet selection we got to indulge in the following morning breakfast.

Guests can choose anything from a full Irish to wholesome options in the healthy section. If breakfast isn’t included in your booking then worry not as the Club Lounge offers a selection of complimentary bites such as fruit salad, croissants and a selection of yogurts with freshly brewed tea/coffee throughout the day. 

If this isn’t enough reason to visit The Address at Dublin 1 then I don’t know what is! It truly is one of Dublin’s little gems, snuggled away in the heart of the big smoke! 🙂

For bookings or inquiries, be sure to have a look on www.theaddressatdublin1.com 

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Disclaimer: This was a complimentary stay, but all views remain my own. 

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Posted on April 23, 2019

Dating women in their 20s VS dating women in their 30s

Dating

Yes, you read that correctly and no, I haven’t started swimming in a new dating pool…

Now that we’ve gotten that out of the way, I guess I should address the second burning question some of you might have: what brings such an intriguing debate to a blog that typically explores topics surrounding dating and relationships from the perspective of a black female from a small town on the Emerald Isle?

The answer is pretty simple.

In my days of interrogating men of varying backgrounds and interests (as you do) there was something startling about their views that I took notice of fairly quickly. The majority of men I would have had heated discussions with about the dynamics of male/female relationships all shared a common denominator: a staggering number of them had similar sentiments about dating women of a certain generation.

Years ago, this topic would have not peaked my interest in the slightest. But now that I am gradually moving into a new age bracket, I’ve naturally developed a growing curiosity towards it. But rather than discussing the development of my dating life throughout my twenties, I thought the best way to tackle this would be to get an honest opinion from someone whom I have often turned to for genuine dating advice.

Without further ado, here is an anonymous blog contribution from a 30-something year old Irish male who will share his thoughts on the matter 🙂

So I have been asked to write down some of my thoughts on dating and my observations on the scene. I myself am no shining example of a human but I would stick myself somewhere in the middle of that list. 

On to the topic at hand, the first thing is finding a woman to date: do you do it old school and analogue or digital? Nowadays we are spoiled with options.Trying to get a date growing up was scary as hell but also fun. You could walk up to a girl and start talking, be polite or maybe a bit cheeky, whichever works and then ask for her number. You would try your best not to sweat, panic or mumble while she more than often was actually quite sound and understanding. Regardless of whether or not they were interested, they respected the effort. 

Well that’s all in the past and as we all know digital communication has taken over everything, and now single again in my mid-thirties I was left with the challenge of getting to know this new form of interaction. Tinder seemed like the most logical starting point so I set about doing my research into how it works to get myself off on the right foot.  

As most of you know …

The first option beyond which gender you would like to match with is age, which is exactly what is being discussed in this blog. So what are the differences between dating women of varying ages from the point of view of a 35-year-old man. After a number of dates with “women” (girls) in their mid-twenties I learned something awesome. I experienced something of what it would be like to be an old rich guy who got a divorce and now has his new trophy girlfriend. I was literally able to have map out holidays, redecorated the front room, plan out the next day in work all in my head while also keeping up with the conversation at hand. Needless to say, the idea of banter did not exist. For me this is a must.

The next age range was roughly 27 to 32. But I will skip this one for now and focus on 32 plus. 

What can I say, sophisticated, witty, well-dressed are just some of the observations any man with a half an eye could make. The sad truth is that I noticed there was a desperation to the dates. Sometimes it came across as knowing what they want, but often I had the impression that they were like that guy in the night club at half two in the morning just trying to chat everyone up because he’s panicking at the idea of going home alone again. I get it, I have been to too many weddings over the last couple of years and they are like the bouncer of our lives telling us to drink up and go home, and most likely alone if it is that late. 

I think these were the first generation of women who truly had close to the opportunities men had and along with this were also sold a lie. 

Like everyone in the 80’s/90’s was sold the lie that if you got a degree you could do anything. Women of the same age were told they can have it all. Has anyone had it all? With the ever-increasing acceptance of social behaviours and career opportunities I think some of this generation thought they could simply focus on career and then pick up a man once they had achieved what they wanted. Now with the unfair situation of the ticking biological clock the pressure is on and how can a healthy relationship develop in this constraint while also trying to hold down a career and figure out a mortgage.

So (my favourite word and greatest indicator of my lack of intellect), to the remaining group…

I could focus on the positives of which there are many or I could focus on the negatives. But the truth of the matter is it is not the difference in age, it’s the difference in narrative that they were sold. I found this generation to be fully aware of the impossible challenge of having it all. They understood that finding an acceptable partner to try and make a life with is not a past time but a job in itself and every jobs require sacrifices. Unlike the generation before them they knew what they wanted and how to get it. Surely this is the narrative that should be sold, to men included, you cannot have it all but if you are lucky, work hard, choose wisely maybe you can get what is important to you.

Until next time,

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Posted on March 4, 2019

10 ways to get a text back on Bumble

Dating

Anyone who has ever flirted with the idea of using online dating as a means of finding a partner would undoubtedly corroborate my words: it is slim pickings out there. While I have been quite fortunate with the vast majority of dates I’ve had (which contrary to what some of you may think have been few or far in between) I still recognise that the world of modern dating has become an absolute minefield.

If you’re not yet familiar with my sentiments towards the likes of Plenty of Fish and Tinder, then I implore you to read 12 things I’ve learned from being on POF and then watch my YouTube video titled 5 things Irish guys should never say to a black girl on Tinder (gotta love a shameless plug in).

A less popular dating app, yet one I would consider to be of better quality than the aforementioned two, surfaced the modern dating sphere towards the end of 2014. Social networking app, Bumble can be used for business purposes (Bumble Bizz), finding new friends (Bumble BFF) or for dating (Bumble Date).

While I do feel that it ranks quite high in the echelon of dating apps, it often gets a bad rap for being a ‘feminist dating app.’ Why? Because in all heterosexual matches, it is up to the woman to message the guy first.

Make of this what you will, but I personally think it is an excellent idea. It is one of the reasons I was drawn to Bumble in the first place. Putting the power in the hands of the woman means we don’t have to worry about getting bombarded by the weird and creepy messages that many of us would have experienced on other apps. I also think it can be pretty beneficial to men who are shy and a bit inexperienced in the dating realm.

Of course, I can’t speak for men but when I’ve asked male Bumble users about their thoughts on this set up, the general consensus seemed to be that women didn’t make a huge effort in the first text. This wouldn’t exactly start things off in an exciting way and would often lead to the usual small talk which let’s be honest, many of us are jaded by at this point.

Worst case scenario for the woman?  Not getting a reply at all.

Bearing this in mind, I’ve decided to compile a list of creative ways women can get the ball rolling on Bumble.  So without further ado, here at 10 ways you can get a text back on Bumble in 2019 🙂

1. Always start with a question that isn’t ‘how are you?’

Using the info you pull from their bio is always effective *wink* *wink*

2. Hone in on that common interest

Can’t fault a gal for not showing a bit of passion!

3. Massage that male ego

Men and their egos, huh?

4. Fetishise him

Just kidding. But speaking of fetishes

5. You could also shake things up a bit by instilling paranoia

Turns out we went to the same college – boring.

6. Make up a chat up line by pulling from his profile

Cheesy, but it works!

7. ALWAYS acknowledge pet animals

This seems like a given.

8. A bitta banter never hurt anyone

To which I responded ‘nothing but the best’

9. The Neil Strauss ‘neg’ approach

For those of you who don’t know, a neg is akin to a back-handed compliment.

10. But try not to take it too far ladies as it might lead to him cutting off all ties…

And another one bits the dust.

What are some of the things you’ve done to try and get a text back on Bumble? I would love to know! tweet me @FilomenaKaguako 🙂

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Posted on January 18, 2019

How to be more period positive with BeYou patches

How To

A menstrual period can be the defining factor for womanhood in the eyes of many females even though some women absolutely despise theirs. Others, embrace their first bleed and believe it to be a central part of their identity as a woman. I always fell into the second category of women. Well, at least until recently… 

Growing up, I had what I liked to call ‘the perfect period.’ I used to menstruate at the same time of the same day of every month – it was like clockwork! My period lasted about five days and I thankfully did not suffer from any obvious menstrual pain. I did (and still do) get severe back pain and often subjected my loved ones to the occasional emotional outburst.

Fast forward a few years to when ingesting the mini pill became a regular part of my daily routine and my so-called ‘perfect period’ was no longer referred to as such. My flow became the absent father of periods which came and went as it pleased.

Thanks to progestin-only birth control, I now have irrational pregnancy scares at random because I don’t have a consistent reminder from Mother Nature to tell me I’m just being my usual over reacting self – the joys of synthetic hormones!

While both my menstrual cycle and flow now differ to my much-loved period of the past, I’ve managed to maintain the positive attitude that I’ve always had towards my monthly bleed. I think it is important to have open and shame-free conversations about menstruation and embrace the most natural thing a woman’s body can do! 🙂

How can we promote period positivity?

BeYou is a UK brand that I’ve recently teamed up with. The period-positive brand aims to break the stigma attached to periods by encouraging open dialogue around a topic that is still pretty much taboo for some people.

BeYou developed a pain relief product containing two natural ingredients which helps ease the muscular tension that can lead to period cramps. Using BeYou period patches can help women have a more positive experience every month which in turn may promote a positive attitude towards menstruation and the conversations surrounding it.

The two active ingredients of the patch are Eucalyptus oil and Menthol which get absorbed through the skin and help ease the muscular tension which causes period cramps.

3-step guide to using your BeYou period patches

Be You period patch

Note: The patches have a strong menthol scent as this is one of the active ingredients that will help ease your pain!

Be You period patch

Note: You can wear it in work, during a commute or even a night time. You can have it on for about 12 hours before you even contemplate using a new one!

Be You period patch

Note: I found it very helpful to remove my patch in the shower, it is fast and painless!

 

I am currently wearing one as I edit this blog post and I have to say, using a natural product that smells feminine, is easy to use and does what it says on the tin is such an empowering experience.

It makes me more proud to be a woman to see brands like BeYou join in on important conversations. I can’t thank them enough for getting me involved 🙂  

Where can you get yours?

You can purchase your BeYou patches on Beyouonline.co.uk

If you are tempted to give BeYou period patches a try, then you can find out more about how to get a free month supply after you sign up to a monthly subscription (T&C’s apply)

Final thoughts

I’d like to finish up with a confession that will hopefully propel the conversation of period positivity even further. A confession that will remind women of the importance of having a healthy attitude towards periods and to encourage young girls to embrace what Mother Nature gave us. Here it is…

Hello, my name is Filomena and sometimes, I like the smell of my period. Some of you might find that gross, but I said it and I’m not taking it back 🙂

Do you have a period confession? If so, share it on Twitter using #ShameFreeMenstruation and let’s help BeYou keep this conversation going! This year is about breaking whatever is left of this bloody stigma – no pun intended.

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*Disclaimer: This product was sent to me for review purposes. But all views remain my own.

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