We’ve all been victims of self-sabotage. We may not identify it as such immediately, but self-sabotaging behaviour is something I’ve witnessed in myself as well as those around me. As you probably know, the first step to resolving any sort of problem is to be aware of what the issue is and to admit you have one.
So without further ado, here are five possible ways you’re self-sabotaging:
1. Comparing yourself to others
Comparing yourself to others, or more specifically, to people who you think are ‘better’ than you is quite possibly one of the biggest forms of self-destruction. Not only can it induce feelings of unworthiness, but it can also prevent you from moving forward with your life. What you probably don’t realise is that when you compare yourself to someone else, you’re only looking at a fraction of their life. You have no idea what that person had to endeavour in order to get to where they are and you probably never will because more often than not, people will only publicise what they want you to see. They might be better off, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re better than you.
2. Comparing others to people in the past
So we’ve established that comparing yourself to others can be destructive, but what about comparing others to people who have hurt you in the past? From my experience, I think this sort of comparison can equally damaging. Don’t get me wrong, I know it is natural to be a little weary of others when you have a record of being back stabbed (once bitten, twice shy), but that doesn’t make it okay to paint everyone with the same brush. There are good eggs and bad eggs, it’s just the nature of this thing we call life. In the same way you will likely cross paths with more back stabbers, you will also meet some big hearts too. Pushing people away and questioning people’s motives will only prevent your heart from opening up to the possibility of loving others and allowing them to love you back. Not everyone is trying to hurt you.
3. Forgetting how to forgive
Humans are flawed. Every single living person in this world is flawed. Some of our flaws are more obvious than others, but the bottom line is that we are all flawed which means we’re bound to make mistakes. You are just as likely to make a mistake as the person next to you. That’s not to say that you should wait for people to screw you over, but instead, don’t take it so personally when they do. You will meet people in all walks of life who will do you wrong and forgiveness is something that needs to be practiced not only for them, but also for your own peace of mind. We have to learn to forgive because there will be a time when you’ll require someone else’s forgiveness too.
4. Analysing everything to death
If you’re looking for a sure way to kill your happiness then this is one of them. Over-thinking and over-analysing often creates problems that were never there to begin with. Not only is it incredibly time consuming but it also takes the joy out of things that should just be fun. Enjoy the moment, nothing good can ever come out of dissecting everything to death.
5. Feeding your emotions instead of facing them
When you use food as a coping mechanism for your problems, it had an impact on both your physical health and your mental well-being. The fat-saturated and overly sweet comfort food might make you feel good at the start. But overtime, you will probably find yourself feeling a lot worse than before. If you find yourself turning to food instead of dealing with your issues, then it’s time to re-evaluate things. Instead of hiding behind a tub of ice cream, sit down and have a word with yourself or even talk to a trusted friend. You need to learn to face your problems without food. Try exercising, meditation, writing or anything creative. The more co-dependent you are on food, the harder it will be to deal with problems without it.
These are only fives ways of how you can self-sabotage. It may not seem like a lot, but its’s enough to know that the self-sabotaging behaviour needs to stop. Whenever I find myself self-sabotaging and creating issues that aren’t there, my logical mind reminds me to look at the facts and to focus on the positives. At the end of the day, a negative attitude will never get you a positive life, it all starts in your mind. Once you cleanse that, you will begin to project positive energy and positive things will start to happen!
Hope you all have a happy Thursday 🙂