Whenever I listen to one of my single friends update me on their latest dating woes, I can only thank God that I no longer have to wrestle with the possibility of a recent right swipe being something I’d later regret. It would seem that the trials and tribulations of modern dating are becoming increasingly tiresome and at this rate, I have the impression that a single first date horror story would be enough to make someone with a perfectly healthy libido want to commit to a life of celibacy.
Between Tinder users openly admitting to already being in a relationship and people going MIA when the details of a first meet up are finalised, there seems to be a growing disillusionment in the dating scene between men and women alike that doesn’t appear to be subsiding any time soon.
So for my first blog of 2020, I wanted to draw from some of these very real experiences and discuss a few of the trends that have become the norm in 21st Century dating. I will admit that I am guilty of having committed one or two of these dating faux pas back in my single days, so know that I am in no way shape or form trying to be sanctimonious here. However, it is a new year so the least we can do is make an effort to put these habits behind us.
Without further ado, here are some of the dating trends that I think have absolutely no place in 2020 🙂
Pulling a Houdini
Commonly known as ‘ghosting,’ this trend is something we can all admit to either having fallen victim to or having committed ourselves. Whatever side of the fence you’re on, it is damaging for both parties. Karma has a way of giving professional ghosters a taste of their own medicine and as for the person on the receiving end, not only does it negatively impact their self-esteem, but it also impacts their attitude towards dating. Be grown and leave the magic to the professionals.
How have you been-ing
I’ve employed this phrase to describe the texts that usually start to prop up during the peak of cuffing season and then again in the lead up to Christmas. There must be something about the end of the year that makes people more inclined to want to rekindle past relationships. If it’s a genuine conversation or possible closure that is needed for the person asking ‘how have you been?’, then that’s fair. But if it’s boredom, then don’t bother because you’re only wasting your own time and theirs.
Much like the last trend, haunting is the term used to describe the presence of an ex in your digital life. The difference being is that they exist silently. They continue to follow you on all your social media accounts, watch every Snapchat story as soon as it goes up and they consistently linger on without actually engaging in any conversation. It’s pretty what some professionals would consider to be light stalking. Keeping tabs on someone through light stalking is never a good look on anyone, leave haunting in 2019.
Fake date planning
This is when someone makes a plan to meet someone for the first time only to have zero intention of actually following through with it. In the week leading up to the date they consistently send texts to share their excitement about meeting up in person only to go MIA the day of the actual date. Naturally, they commit trend 1, 3 and 2 almost instantly after planning a fake date.
Now that technology has allowed us to have so much more access to one another, people are becoming more aware of their options. As such, they would rather play the field before committing to meeting someone in real life. If you would rather send endless texts before meeting up with someone, then that’s okay once you’re honest about wanting to explore your options. Time is too precious to waste so it’s always a good idea to make it clear what kind of dater you are.
Let 2020 be a year of growth and mutual respect for potential love interests by leaving these god awful dating trends in the past what do you say? 🙂
- 10000Dating. I’ve never really been a fan of the term. Not only do I think it’s very American, but the word itself makes me incredibly awkward. Whenever I hear the word date, I automatically picture two strangers sitting in close proximity to one another in an often controlled environment: uncomfortable body…