Browsing Tag

bumble

Posted on January 1, 2020

Dating trends to leave in 2019

Dating

dating trends

Whenever I listen to one of my single friends update me on their latest dating woes, I can only thank God that I no longer have to wrestle with the possibility of a recent right swipe being something I’d later regret. It would seem that the trials and tribulations of modern dating are becoming increasingly tiresome and at this rate, I have the impression that a single first date horror story would be enough to make someone with a perfectly healthy libido want to commit to a life of celibacy. 

Between Tinder users openly admitting to already being in a relationship and people going MIA when the details of a first meet up are finalised, there seems to be a growing disillusionment in the dating scene between men and women alike that doesn’t appear to be subsiding any time soon. 

So for my first blog of 2020, I wanted to draw from some of these very real experiences and discuss a few of the trends that have become the norm in 21st Century dating. I will admit that I am guilty of having committed one or two of these dating faux pas back in my single days, so know that I am in no way shape or form trying to be sanctimonious here. However, it is a new year so the least we can do is make an effort to put these habits behind us.

Without further ado, here are some of the dating trends that I think have absolutely no place in 2020 🙂

Pulling a Houdini

Commonly known as ‘ghosting,’ this trend is something we can all admit to either having fallen victim to or having committed ourselves. Whatever side of the fence you’re on, it is damaging for both parties. Karma has a way of giving professional ghosters a taste of their own medicine and as for the person on the receiving end, not only does it negatively impact their self-esteem, but it also impacts their attitude towards dating. Be grown and leave the magic to the professionals.

How have you been-ing

I’ve employed this phrase to describe the texts that usually start to prop up during the peak of cuffing season and then again in the lead up to Christmas. There must be something about the end of the year that makes people more inclined to want to rekindle past relationships. If it’s a genuine conversation or possible closure that is needed for the person asking ‘how have you been?’, then that’s fair. But if it’s boredom, then don’t bother because you’re only wasting your own time and theirs. 

Haunting 

Much like the last trend, haunting is the term used to describe the presence of an ex in your digital life. The difference being is that they exist silently. They continue to follow you on all your social media accounts, watch every Snapchat story as soon as it goes up and they consistently linger on without actually engaging in any conversation. It’s pretty what some professionals would consider to be light stalking. Keeping tabs on someone through light stalking is never a good look on anyone, leave haunting in 2019.

Fake date planning 

This is when someone makes a plan to meet someone for the first time only to have zero intention of actually following through with it. In the week leading up to the date they consistently send texts to share their excitement about meeting up in person only to go MIA the day of the actual date. Naturally, they commit trend 1, 3 and 2 almost instantly after planning a fake date. 

Penpaling

Now that technology has allowed us to have so much more access to one another, people are becoming more aware of their options. As such, they would rather play the field before committing to meeting someone in real life. If you would rather send endless texts before meeting up with someone, then that’s okay once you’re honest about wanting to explore your options. Time is too precious to waste so it’s always a good idea to make it clear what kind of dater you are.

Let 2020 be a year of growth and mutual respect for potential love interests by leaving these god awful dating trends in the past what do you say? 🙂

Twitter Facebook Instagram

Related Posts

  • 10000
    Dating. I’ve never really been a fan of the term. Not only do I think it’s very American, but the word itself makes me incredibly awkward. Whenever I hear the word date, I automatically picture two strangers sitting in close proximity to one another in an often controlled environment: uncomfortable body…
  • 10000
    Throughout my years of attempting to navigate the bewildering world of modern romance, I’ve had many aversions towards online dating and widely used apps such as Tinder and Plenty of Fish. Without delving straight into it or coming across as deeply judgmental, I will simply say that for the good…
  • 10000
    Anyone who has ever flirted with the idea of using online dating as a means of finding a partner would undoubtedly corroborate my words: it is slim pickings out there. While I have been quite fortunate with the vast majority of dates I've had (which contrary to what some of you…
  • 32
    I know, I know - believe you me, I know. I have reached a new low *straight face emoji* And the reason why I call it a low is because I've never been one to use online dating. If anything, I've always been the type to secretly judge those who…
    Tags: pof, tinder, dating, life, good, you're, real, online
Posted on March 4, 2019

10 ways to get a text back on Bumble

Dating

Anyone who has ever flirted with the idea of using online dating as a means of finding a partner would undoubtedly corroborate my words: it is slim pickings out there. While I have been quite fortunate with the vast majority of dates I’ve had (which contrary to what some of you may think have been few or far in between) I still recognise that the world of modern dating has become an absolute minefield.

If you’re not yet familiar with my sentiments towards the likes of Plenty of Fish and Tinder, then I implore you to read 12 things I’ve learned from being on POF and then watch my YouTube video titled 5 things Irish guys should never say to a black girl on Tinder (gotta love a shameless plug in).

A less popular dating app, yet one I would consider to be of better quality than the aforementioned two, surfaced the modern dating sphere towards the end of 2014. Social networking app, Bumble can be used for business purposes (Bumble Bizz), finding new friends (Bumble BFF) or for dating (Bumble Date).

While I do feel that it ranks quite high in the echelon of dating apps, it often gets a bad rap for being a ‘feminist dating app.’ Why? Because in all heterosexual matches, it is up to the woman to message the guy first.

Make of this what you will, but I personally think it is an excellent idea. It is one of the reasons I was drawn to Bumble in the first place. Putting the power in the hands of the woman means we don’t have to worry about getting bombarded by the weird and creepy messages that many of us would have experienced on other apps. I also think it can be pretty beneficial to men who are shy and a bit inexperienced in the dating realm.

Of course, I can’t speak for men but when I’ve asked male Bumble users about their thoughts on this set up, the general consensus seemed to be that women didn’t make a huge effort in the first text. This wouldn’t exactly start things off in an exciting way and would often lead to the usual small talk which let’s be honest, many of us are jaded by at this point.

Worst case scenario for the woman?  Not getting a reply at all.

Bearing this in mind, I’ve decided to compile a list of creative ways women can get the ball rolling on Bumble.  So without further ado, here at 10 ways you can get a text back on Bumble in 2019 🙂

1. Always start with a question that isn’t ‘how are you?’

Using the info you pull from their bio is always effective *wink* *wink*

2. Hone in on that common interest

Can’t fault a gal for not showing a bit of passion!

3. Massage that male ego

Men and their egos, huh?

4. Fetishise him

Just kidding. But speaking of fetishes

5. You could also shake things up a bit by instilling paranoia

Turns out we went to the same college – boring.

6. Make up a chat up line by pulling from his profile

Cheesy, but it works!

7. ALWAYS acknowledge pet animals

This seems like a given.

8. A bitta banter never hurt anyone

To which I responded ‘nothing but the best’

9. The Neil Strauss ‘neg’ approach

For those of you who don’t know, a neg is akin to a back-handed compliment.

10. But try not to take it too far ladies as it might lead to him cutting off all ties…

And another one bits the dust.

What are some of the things you’ve done to try and get a text back on Bumble? I would love to know! tweet me @FilomenaKaguako 🙂

Twitter   Facebook   Instagram

Related Posts

  • 10000
    Dating. I’ve never really been a fan of the term. Not only do I think it’s very American, but the word itself makes me incredibly awkward. Whenever I hear the word date, I automatically picture two strangers sitting in close proximity to one another in an often controlled environment: uncomfortable body…
  • 10000
    I can’t sit here and say that every single one of my exes were idiots, because that would be a lie. But there were certainly one or two – okay maybe three - four max, that I would gladly give that title to. If all the years that I’ve spent being…
  • 10000
    I know, I know - believe you me, I know. I have reached a new low *straight face emoji* And the reason why I call it a low is because I've never been one to use online dating. If anything, I've always been the type to secretly judge those who…
  • 38
    https://youtu.be/G0ajT6aJWuk Ladies, if you’ve ever been called a psycho by a man then I’m sure you’ll resonate with my latest YouTube video. I’ve explored some of the reasons why men call women psychos. I hope you enjoy watching it as much as I enjoyed putting it together for you guys,…
    Tags: men
Back to top
%d bloggers like this: